http://a-o-j-m.blogspot.jp/2016/10/teru-teru-bozu.html
After all, it was postpond today even though it didn't rain after we recieved the email which informed us the cancelarion of the sports day at 7:20am.
Maybe teachers weren't able to make a decision of carrying out the sports day because it started raining around 6:45 am last Saturday.
It will be sunny today, so I am looking forward to going to see the sports day.
By the way, I am very busy recently because we finally purchaced the used piano for my daughter.
I wrote in my previous post that I decided that I will let her learn both Electone and piano : http://a-o-j-m.blogspot.jp/2016/09/piano-trial-lesson.html
She likes practising the Electone and practises playing it for about 30 minutes every day.
She is good at music dictation and modulation.
I want to enhance her motivation and music skills.
I believe that piano lesson will improve her performance skill and increase the interest in music.
The piano will come to our house at the end of October, so I need to make room to install it.
We need to move the Electone to the kids room on the second floor.
I already moved the bookshelf in the living room, and decluttered it last weekend.
I sold old CDs and books at the CD at the ricycle shop.
I still need to screen a lot of things and throw unnecessary things away.
It is a very hard work and I need time to do it, but it is also fun for me.
I am looking forward to coming the piano.
We visited four piano shops and I really liked its sound when I tried to play the piano which we bought.
I also want to practise piano with her and hope that it will be my fun in my rest of life.
I was helping her Electone practise last evening.
My 7-year-old son wanted to play it.
He had also learned playing the Electone until last September, but he quitted it because he didn't pracitse it at all.
He could still play it, but after that, my daughter played same song and he realized that she played it better than him.
He said:
"She has a great music talent than me, but I have a great drawing talent than her! I am going to draw a picture, it's my homework today. It will display at the citizens exhibition."
It was funny for me because he finally admitted that her sister is finally able to play the Electone better than him.
But he always doesn't want to lose to her as her elder brother.
She played the songs called "Pretty Bouquet".
Please try to listen it if you like.
Thank you(^o^) for reading this article!
Hello Kumi-san,
ReplyDeleteThe song in the video was such a pretty sounding song.
It also sounds like you have a lot of reorganizing to do to get your home ready for the piano. Do you tune them yourself or get them tuned periodically by someone else?
When I looked up the title of the video in the Japanese/English dictionary I use it said: "Pretty Flower Bunch". It so annoying how bad the Japanese to English translation dictionaries are, pretty flower bouquet is a much better translation. I really hope that I am able to get good enough a Japanese one day were I will be able to use a Japanese dictionary only.
Here is a list of some of the issues found in the rest of the post:
Part 1:
This line:
After all, it was postpond today even though it didn't rain after we recieved the email which informed us the cancelarion of the sports day at 7:20am.
Would be better worded as:
(After all that/However), it was postponed today even though it didn't rain, we received an email which informed us of the cancellation of the sports day at 7:20am.
Reason: There were a few different types of corrections in the above sentence to make it sound slightly more natural.
1. "After all" would be better worded as "After all that/However". "After all that" is a common expression in English generally used to indicate that some event had to be done in spite of some other event.
Examples:
I turned on my stove to cook bread and after all that I found I had no flour!
I rushed home so I could watch TV and after all that found the TV show was over!
2. Corrected spelling for "postponed"
3. Corrected spelling for "received". Remember the phrase "i before e except after c" to aide you in spelling the word correctly.
4. Corrected spelling "cancellation".
5. Added a little extra punctuation and changed the order of some words to make the sentence flow a little easier.
This line:
Maybe teachers weren't able to make a decision of carrying out the sports day because it started raining around 6:45 am last Saturday.
Should be:
Maybe the teachers weren't able to make the decision of carrying out the sports day because it started raining around 6:45 am last Saturday.
Reason: Changed "teachers" to "the teachers" as you were referencing a specific group of teachers at your daughters school. Knowing when it should be "teachers" or "the teachers" is confusing but that way I try to think of it is as follows:
If you are talking about a specific group of teacher then you almost always use "the teachers".
If you are talking about teacher in general (I not about specific teachers) you can usually just use "teachers".
Examples:
Teachers were very angry as the students were fighting. (Wrong because this sentence is talking about specific group of teachers)
The teachers were very angry as the students were fighting. (Right)
Teachers are not paid enough. (Right - As the sentence is about all teachers in general)
The teachers are not paid enough. (This sentence would be right if talking about specific teachers, and wrong if you are wanting to talk about teachers in general.)
This line:
By the way, I am very busy recently because we finally purchaced the used piano for my daughter.
Should be:
By the way, I am very busy recently because we finally purchased a used piano for my daughter.
Reason: Corrected spelling of "purchased" also changed "purchased the" to "purchased a"
Part 2:
ReplyDeleteThis line:
She likes practising the Electone and practises playing it for about 30 minutes every day.
Reason: It is grammatically correct but it is a little repetitive, it could be rewritten as:
She likes to practise the Electone for about 30 minutes every day.
This line:
I believe that piano lesson will improve her performance skill and increase the interest in music.
Should be:
I believe that piano lessons will improve her performance skill and increase her interest in music.
Reason: Changed "piano lesson" to "piano lessons" as there will be multiple lessons. Also changed "increase the" to "increase her".
This line:
I already moved the bookshelf in the living room, and decluttered it last weekend.
Reason: I am unsure how to interpret the sentence above. Did you mean that you moved the bookshelf into your living room. Or did you mean that you moved the bookshelf out of your living room?
This line:
I sold old CDs and books at the CD at the ricycle shop.
Should be:
I sold the old CDs and books at the CD at the recycling shop.
Reason: Recycle is spelt with an Re not Ri. Also in English in generally when we recycle items we usually say recycling. Though as far as I am able to determine recycle shop is grammatically correct.
This line:
I am looking forward to coming the piano.
Should be:
I am looking forward to the piano coming.
This line:
I also want to practise piano with her and hope that it will be my fun in my rest of life.
Should be:
I also want to practise piano with her and hope that it will bring (enjoyment/fun) throughout my life.
This line:
I was helping her Electone practise last evening.
Should be:
I was helping her with Electone practise last evening.
This line:
He had also learned playing the Electone until last September, but he quitted it because he didn't pracitse it at all.
Should be:
He had also been learning to play the Electone until last September, but he stopped learning it because he didn't practise it at all.
This line:
"She has a great music talent than me, but I have a great drawing talent than her! I am going to draw a picture, it's my homework today. It will display at the citizens exhibition."
Should be:
"She has a greater music talent than me, but I have a greater drawing talent than her! I am going to draw a picture, it's my homework today. It will display at the citizens exhibition."
Reason: You use "Greater" when you want to compare someone else's skill to another persons. You use "Great" when you want to say how good someone is at something but not in comparison to someone else.
Examples:
My daughter enjoys food to a greater extent than my son!
My daughter has greater skill at eating than my son!
My son is great at drawing and my daughter is great at playing piano!
This line:
It was funny for me because he finally admitted that her sister is finally able to play the Electone better than him.
Should be:
It was funny for me because he finally admitted that his sister is finally able to play the Electone better than him.
This line:
But he always doesn't want to lose to her as her elder brother.
Should be:
But he never wants to lose to her as her elder brother.
This line:
She played the songs called "Pretty Bouquet".
Should be:
She played the song called "Pretty Bouquet".
This line:
Please try to listen it if you like.
Should be:
Please try to listen to it if you like.