2/23/2016

If you want someone to change, change yourself first

Since I had a ploblem at my work which I had to resolve yesterday, my husband took a day off to take care of our 5-year-old daugher.

Since her symptoms were worse than yesterday, I made a reservation to see a doctor in the morning.

My husband texted me that she was diagnosed with the flu of type B by the doctor.

I was relieved because the doctor prescribed medicine for her and she would get well soon by taking it.

After I finished working, I picked up my 7-year-old son from the children's house and we went shopping together.

While I was putting groceries which I bought in my shopping bag, he found a lucky bag of Youkai watch (Japanese popular anime for children ) which included some merchandise of Youkai watch were sold at the supermarcket.

He came back and told me:

"Look mom. That is a happy bag of Youkai watch. But that's waste of money."

"Maybe they are unsold stocks of New Year's sale. How much is that?"

"Well, It is 2,160yen."

"Really? It is too expensive!"

We went to the bargain basement and looked at the price tag.

"Wow! It's not 2,160yen. Look! It is written 50% off. Do you understand? 50% off means the price is a half of 2,160yen. I mean, it is 1,080yen."

"Really? It is affordable!"

"If you want it, you can buy it if you pay for it out of your allowance."

If he does a chore, I give him 10 yen for his allowance.

He has saved his money in the piggy bank, and it has reached more than 5,000yen.

"Wow! I will take it!"

Since it included a file named Youkai Daijiten which put Youkai medals away and he has wanted it for a lnog time, he was very glad to buy it.

After we came home, I tried not to say to him "do your homework first".

I only asked him:

"How is your schedule tonight?"

"Well, I will do my homework from 7:30 and finish at 7:50!"

"All right. You can do it!"

He did his homework on time.


I have been worried that he can't decide something by himself.

He always minds how I think.

He thinks he has to do his homework because I forced him to do it.

I know I a partly the cause of this.

I have often denied his hopes.

For example, if he told me that he wanted the Youkai Daijiten, I told him it was waste of money.

If he didn't start doing homework, I said: "Do your homework first!" even though he was going to start doing homework.

I did not respect his opinions.

I wanted him to experience not only saving money but also buying what he wanted with his money.

I wanted to respect his ideas and I wanted him to be proud of himself.

The Youkai Daijiten is not watste of money for him.

That's why I changed my opinions.
I tried not to instruct him, and tried to remind him.

Then he changes little by little.

I don't have to get angry with him.

I realized that I am brought up as a mother by my children.




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4 comments:

  1. Hello Kumi-san,

    Another fun read. Saving is always a good thing to instill in the young and a very good habit to get into. Though I can't say I am surprised that your son is very good at it. As saving seems to be something people from Japan are very good at, if the financial news that I sometimes watch is anything to go by.

    Part 1:

    This line:
    Since I had a ploblem of my work which I had to resolve within yesterday, my husband took a day off to take care of our 5-year-old daugher yesterday.

    Should be:
    Since I had a problem at my work which I had to resolve yesterday, my husband took a day off to take care of our 5-year-old daughter.

    Reason: Main change was removing the ending yesterday as this was not needed. Same reason for within.

    This line:
    Since her symptom was worse than yesterday, I made a reservation to see a doctor in the morning.

    Should be:
    Since her symptoms were worse than yesterday, I made a reservation to see a doctor in the morning.

    This line:
    After I finished working, I picked my 7-year-old son from the children's house and went shopping together.

    Should be:
    After I finished working, I picked up my 7-year-old son from the children's house and we went shopping together.

    This line:
    While I was putting groceries which I bought in my shopping bag, he found a happy bag of Youkai watch (Japanese popular anime for children ) which included some goods of Youkai watch were sold at the supermarcket.

    Question: Does happy bag mean a bag with a collection of different things in it? If so that would be better said as variety bag or lucky bag. Assuming this is right then I would rewrite as:

    While I was putting groceries which I bought in my shopping bag, he found a (variety/lucky) bag of Youkai watch (Japanese popular anime for children) which included some merchandise from Youkai watch which were sold at the supermarket.


    This line:
    "Maybe they are dead stocks of New Year's sale. How much is that?"

    Should be:
    "Maybe they are unsold stock from the New Year's sale. How much is that?"

    This line:
    He has saved his money in the saving box, and it has reached more than 5,000yen.

    Note: above line is not wrong just want to mention that a container that children save money in is called "A Piggy Bank", because the containers are often shaped like pigs, see: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Piggy_bank

    This line:
    Since it included a file named Youkai Daijiten which put Youkai medals away and he had wanted it for a lnog time, he was very glad to buy it.

    Should be:
    Since it included a file named Youkai Daijiten which put Youkai medals away and he has wanted it for a long time, he was very glad to buy it.

    This line:
    He always minds how I think.

    Should be:
    He always (minds/is mindful of) what I think.

    ReplyDelete
  2. Part 2:

    This line:
    I know I made the cause.

    Should be:
    I know I a partly the cause of this.

    This line:
    I often denied his hopes.

    Should be:
    I have often denied his hopes.

    This line:
    If he didn't started doing homework, I said: "Do your homework first!" even though he was going to start doing homework.

    Should be:
    If he didn't start doing homework, I said: "Do your homework first!" even though he was going to start doing homework.

    This line:
    I had not respected his opinions.

    Should be:
    I did not respect his opinions.

    This line:
    I wanted him to know not only saving money but also buying what he wanted by his money.

    Should be:
    I wanted him to experience not only saving money but also buying what he wanted with his money.

    This line:
    That's why I tried to change myself first.

    Note: Above line is not wrong but would be more likely to be said as:

    That's why I tried to see things from his point of view.

    Or:

    That's why I tried to put myself in his shoes.

    Or:

    That's why I changed my opinions.

    This line:
    Then he is changing little by little.

    Should be:
    Then he changes little by little.

    This line:
    I realized that I am brought up as a mother by my children.

    Question: Not entirely sure how to interpret the above line, do you mean:

    I realized that I am improving as a mother because of my children.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Hello Terry.
      Thank you for a lot of corrections.
      I really appriciate you.


      This line:
      I realized that I am brought up as a mother by my children.

      Question: Not entirely sure how to interpret the above line, do you mean:

      I realized that I am improving as a mother because of my children.

      It is difficult to explain in English, but I think your sentence is as alomost same as what I wanted to say, but there is a slight diffecence between your suggestion and what I wanted to say.


      I wanted to say:

      I bring up my children, but I am also brought up as a mother by my children because if they weren't born, I could have not become a mother.

      I am worried whether I could express what I wanted to say to you in English.



      Delete
    2. I think I understand they improve your mothering skills.

      Delete